Leading with love isn't soft, it's Revolutionary

Photo by Doriana Popa

Ambitious, mission-driven leaders are often taught to armor up.

To critique before they celebrate. 

To strive before they rest. 

To lead through control, not connection.

But what if there’s another way?

A way of leading that doesn’t abandon your standards or ambition, but expands your capacity to meet others (and yourself) with compassion, truth, and trust.

This is the inner journey of leading with love.

The Shields That Got You Here

Many of us have succeeded because of our inner critic, not despite it. The part of you that pushes, perfects, controls, and gets things done. That part probably helped you build what you have today.

These are your shields, protectors forged through experience. They helped you survive. Maybe even thrive.

So don’t judge them. Thank them.

And then, with awareness, ask yourself: Is this protector still serving me now?

Because here’s the thing: what helped you rise may no longer help you lead.

The Inner Dialogue of a New Kind of Leadership

The shift from fear to love isn’t a one-and-done decision. It’s more like developing a relationship between your inner critic and your compassionate voice.

One voice pushes you: “Be better. Try harder. Fix it now.” 

The other voice trusts in you : “Breathe. It’s enough. You’re enough.”

And no, you don’t have to silence the critic. It belongs at the table too. But you can choose which voice you center in your leadership.

You’re learning to hold both:

• The part of you that strives for excellence

• And the part that wants to create safety, possibility, and wholeness, for yourself and others.

This is what it means to lead with love.

💡 Ask Better Questions

One client once asked: “How do I even know if I want to lead with love?”

The real question is: “How do I want to evolve my leadership to create safer, more expansive spaces, for myself and others?”

Because when we lead from fear, we might get results. But at what cost?

• Psychological safety disappears

• Teams shrink instead of stretch

• People play small or burn out altogether

Are we truly empowering human potential when we lead with criticism, perfectionism, and urgency?

Or is there a middle path, one where we can hold ambition and accountability and foster belonging and belief?

🌱 Real Love Is Grown, Not Given

bell hooks wrote:

“To truly love we must learn to mix various ingredients – care, affection, recognition, respect, commitment, and trust, as well as honest and open communication.”

When we’re loved, we feel seen and safe. When we lead with love, we help others feel that too.

But real love doesn’t just appear. It grows in the space between our intentions and our actions. It asks us to:

• Heal the wounds that made us hard

• Release the myths we were told about what leadership “should” look like

• Choose, again and again, to respond from presence, not protection

Love is a choice. And it starts within.

The more we soften our internal environment, the more powerfully we shape the external one.

So here’s the invitation for you this week:

❤️ What if you didn’t have to let go of the driven parts of you… but simply led them with more love?

🌟 Curious to Explore More With Me?

For mission-driven leaders willing to sit with discomfort and discover the wisdom in both their inner critic and their compassionate voice, this work is for you. 

🗓️🤝 — Schedule your 1:1 session 

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